A Birth Story: Take 2

From the outset, this birth was going to be very different from the first time around. My pregnancy with E was overseen by an OB on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills. Delivery took place at a hospital where celebrity babies make their grand entrances. This time we received prenatal care from midwives at a birth center in rural Pennsylvania. The major traffic concerns during the drive while in labor were horse and buggies or cow crossings.

My biggest hope with the pregnancy was to go into labor on my own. I was a high risk pregnancy but there was no reason that the birth itself would be any more risk than normal. I have done a pitocin-induced birth without pain medication. I know I can do it. I just did not want to have to.

Contractions started making an appearance at about the 37 week mark of my pregnancy. At 38 weeks I was having regular-ish contractions. One night I had them 8 minutes apart for two hours. I was absolutely convinced that this baby would be early. But each night I would go to bed and wake up with no contractions and no baby.

My mum and sister arrived at 39 weeks. The plan was for my mum to team help Matthew during labor again and for my sister to watch E. My first check was at 39 weeks 5 days and I was 1+ dilated, soft, with a baby in -1 station. My body was definitely more ready to give birth this time around. I felt sure I'd have this baby close to my July 4 due date.

Despite that, I was still pregnant more than a week later. My sister had to return home on July 9. On July 13 (a Friday, none the less) we headed to our weekly NST at the high risk OB, which showed good movement. The initial excitement over labor signs had gradually been wearing away as time passed. By this point I had started remembering some of the harder parts of labor and there was a small feeling of dread beginning to make itself known. My previous labor and delivery came up during the NST test and I told the full story to the tech. She had lots of questions about our choice to deliver at the birth center and had such words of affirmation about my rock star abilities to birth that I left feeling more at ease than I had been in days.

At 12:15p we had an appointment at the birth center to start a foley bulb induction. The idea was to try non-pitocin induction methods before I hit 42 weeks, when I would be required to deliver at the hospital. At 12:45p, the bulb was inserted. I was roughly 3 cm dilated and soft. The foley bulb would help me dilate to 4 cm and the pressure on my cervix would help release the hormones my body was looking for to kick start labor.

3 hours later, the foley bulb came out but no contractions.

At 9:45p I added 2oz of castor oil to a chocolate milk shake.

Around 11p, still having no contractions, I nursed E to sleep. As I held her sleeping, curled up in my arms, I realized I was starting to feel something. I carried her up to bed and decided it might be time to download a contraction timer to my phone. Not thinking much of it, I started timing contractions. The were about a minute long and 5 minutes apart. After 45 minutes I decided that they weren't quite close enough to warrant going to the birth center and thought a shower might slow them a bit so I could get some sleep. I spent another 45 minutes in the shower letting warm water run over my back. It didn't have quite the effect I expected. Post-shower, I lay in bed timing contractions that averaged 45 seconds long but only 2 minutes apart. At just before 2, I realized that this was the real thing.

'Um, honey, it's time to go to the birth center.'

Matthew called the birth center to let them know we were on our way. The midwife had delivered another baby just after midnight so they were already at the center and ready to go. I woke my mum to let her know that we were heading in. The plan was for her to stay home with E until morning. I waddled to the car and sat there, smiling and giggling to myself, while Matthew loaded the car. I wanted to make sure Mum knew I was okay since she would not be able to attend as much of this birth as she had the first time. I couldn't quite believe that this was really it. As we started the drive, Matthew realized he had left his wallet at home. He paused, as if to turn the car to retrieve it, just as I had a contraction.

'Just drive- if anyone stops us, they can follow us to the birth center,' I told him.

It was a bit surreal driving through the black countryside on winding roads surrounded by dark fields and farms. During the drive the contractions increased enough in intensity that I started making low throat sounds to help myself relax through them.

We arrived at the birth center at 2:15a and were ushered in to one of the two birthing rooms. The midwife, Merrilee, and a nurse got us situated, turning on low lights and arranging our bags. Merrilee was one of the midwives that I'd only met once during my prenatal care. She was about halfway through her third trimester in her own pregnancy. I couldn't imagine having the energy to deliver a baby at that point in either pregnancy. After a quick check to see how the baby was doing via doppler, I asked if I could get in the tub. My back was starting to hurt with each contraction and soaking in the tub sounded great. I climbed in as the tub was filling and asked Matthew to start doing counter pressure during my contractions. The water felt nice but it was hard to get in a truly comfortable position. Reclining or leaning forward increased the back pain so I sat, cross-legged and slightly slumped, in the middle of the tub.

With each contraction, I did my best to stay relaxed. With my eyes closed, I focused on what my body was doing and blocked out pretty much everything around me. The low vocalizations and counter pressure helped but I was starting to struggle. I had not expected to have back labor again. The pain was different in that it only came during contractions but it kept throwing me off.

I was in the tub for a while when I felt like I needed to either use the bathroom or push. Matthew got Merrilee and they helped me to the bathroom. I sat on the toilet and worked through some more contractions. Merrilee asked if I wanted her to check my progress. I said yes, expecting to hear that I was well into, if not through, transition. Dilation was actually only to about 5 cm. This was surprising to both Matthew and me. Based on my vocalizations and general mood, Matthew thought I would be well into transition. Since I was expecting to be told that this baby was ready to birth I would have estimated I was much further along. I reminded myself that I went from 5 cm to baby out in just over an hour the first time around. Focusing on the number would only lead to negative thoughts. The toilet was comfortable so I sat there for a while longer, with Matthew and Merrilee sitting on the floor.

I moved to the bed next. Merrilee left us to ourselves. The birth center has full-sized beds to labor in which was quite the upgrade from the hospital. It allowed Matthew to lay next to me for counter pressure. I tried multiple positions. A favorite was on my knees with my chest and arms resting on the birth ball in front of me. I'd swivel my hips through each contraction, easing the pain in my lower back. I would have stayed that way indefinitely but my belly was too heavy! Prior to going into labor with E, I read many books on the subject of birth. Many included pictures of mothers laboring and delivering partially or entirely nude. In my pre-baby mind, I thought, 'Who would do that? Why not be covered?'
As I was laboring on the bed I was struck by the fact that I was completely unclothed and could not be bothered to be embarrassed about it. I had a small towel keeping my hips warm but the thought of distracting my focus by finding something to wear seemed ridiculous.

Settling in on my right side, with Matthew spooned behind me, I tried to be calm and relaxed. The back labor continued to stress me- I kept expecting the labor to go out of control the way it did when my pitocin was too high during E's birth. An irrational fear since I was not on Pitocin but labor isn't really the time for logic. There was alot of pressure on my tailbone, making me feel like I needed to push, plus lower back pain that came with each contraction. Matthew gently reminded me to breath deep and make lower pitched noises as I would start to panic. Merrilee came and sat next to me, holding my hand. I remember thinking that I needed to stay relaxed because I didn't want to hurt her hand. At one point I said that I couldn't do this and she responded, 'But you are doing this.'
With their help I was able to drift off to sleep. I woke with each contraction but slept again in between. Matthew dozed next to me, providing counter pressure and soothing words as I needed them. I tried to be clear about what was and was not working.

At about 5a, my water finally broke with a giant gush. I felt immediate relief in my lower back but still had the hard part ahead- a baby was about to make his or her entrance into the world!

Ten or so minutes after my water broke, I started to feel my body pushing on its own. I let Merrilee know and, with the help of the nurse, I was positioned on my side for some slow pushing. Merrilee was aware of the tearing issues I had with my first delivery and was aiming to avoid a repeat. Pushing lasted about 20 minutes. Compared to having two pushes total the first time around, it felt like and eternity. I growled, 'Get this baby out of me!' at one point.

Finally, with a last push, there was relief and a warm, wet, squirming baby on my chest at 5:34a! After cuddling for a moment, we realized we didn't know the sex of the baby yet. A quick peak revealed that we had a little boy. We've had a boy name ready since we were dating and now we had a boy to give it to: Owen Alexander. Together the name means 'well-born protector of mankind'. A big name for such a tiny person.

The cord was cut after it finished pulsing and the midwife showed me the placenta, something I didn't get to do after E's birth. I offered to nurse but he wasn't interested. We cuddled and between 6 and 6:30, E and my mum arrived. It was incredibly sweet to introduce E to her new baby brother. She had been so excited about the prospect of becoming a big sister and meeting the baby in my 'baby belly'.

I had a little bit of clotting issue so the midwife gave me a shot of pitocin to help clear things out and get my uterus on its way back to proper shaping. I was slightly amused that I didn't manage to completely avoid the awful stuff this time around. A shot in the thigh is not really comparable to an IV drip of the drug so it was not a big deal.

We spent time as a family, cuddling and resting. I gave nursing another try. O was having a little trouble with sucking so Merrilee used her finger to show him how to use his tongue. A few minutes later, he was latched on and enjoying his first meal.

Merrilee and the morning nurse, Karen, asked if they could do the newborn examination about 2 hours after he was born. Healthy baby boy measured in at 8 pounds 9 ounces and a whopping 22" long. After ensuring that my bleeding/clotting was resolving itself, Merrilee, pregnant and exhausted herself, wished us the best and excused herself, leaving us in Karen's care. The birth center requires that new moms and babies stay for a minimum of 4 hours. As the time was approaching, my pulse rate was higher than normal, running around 110-115. Karen told me I could go home when my pulse was under 100. We did some more resting and family time. I got dressed and read to E while Matthew snuggled O.

At just past 11, Karen okayed me to leave. My pulse was still slightly high but she decided I would have an easier time relaxing in my own home. We dressed O in the same outfit that E wore home from the hospital, along with an airplane print diaper. Just under 6 hours after his birth, O was strapped into his car seat and headed home.

Welcome to the family, baby boy!

The Birth Story - Matthew's Version

After anticipating our baby's arrival for many months, the time had finally arrived. Unfortunately, not with a "I think I'm having contractions!" but with, "Well, we're two weeks past due. Time to go in for our appointment..."

We headed to Cedars Sinai with no real fuss - our small group came over and prayed with us for a while before we went in. I felt a real peace about what was about to happen, even though it should have been a nerve wracking time. I'm not sure why they had us go in at 10PM - I would have much preferred to spend the night in my own bed than in the hospital, but so we went.

Check in was no problem - they were friendly and reassuring. Our first nurse, Carmen, was very nice and excited that we wanted a birth with minimal medical intervention. We went through a standard round of questions about Beckie's health and the progression of the pregnancy... pretty straightforward. They got Beckie hooked into the pitocin drip about 11PM and off we went.

Beckie's mom was with us through the whole process, and she took the first shift of watching and helping Beckie so that I could sleep. The cot they had wasn't bad, but it wasn't great. Beckie had some small contractions as the night went on - she and her mom walked the halls and she tried laying in different positions to stay comfortable. Moving around was a bit of a pain because she had to take the IV pole with her everywhere and she had to unhook from all the monitors.... what a process!

About 6:30 in the morning, a new nurse came in, along with a doctor (resident) to see how Beckie was doing. The baby was still floating high and she wasn't terribly dilated, so they asked us if we would like to try using a Foley bulb. Basically, they put a catheter in through the cervical opening and then inflated it slightly. This put pressure on the cervix, which helped it open. When the catheter fell out, we would know that Beckie was at 3.5-4.5 cm, which the doctors considered as active labor.

At this point, I was awake and moving, so I took a spell helping Beckie walk the halls. We did some dancing and some swaying, trying to hula that baby down! Dr. Brown stopped in for a few minutes to see how we were doing, and then she headed off to start her day. I gave Beckie backrubs, as by this point, she had some pretty bad back pain. I was concerned that the baby might have turned. On one trip about the hall, I noticed that Beckie was leaving a small trail of blood, and so we let one nurse know it would need to be cleaned up, then went back to our room and called our nurse. The Foley bulb had come loose, and so we were ready to move to an active labor room. Unfortunately, the labor and delivery ward was hopping, so a room wasn't ready for us... we waited for about 2.5 hours, just giving Beckie counter pressure on her back and helping her any way we could.

When we got into the labor and delivery room, I thought we might get to relax a little because the room was much more comfortable. Beckie's body had other plans, having kicked into high gear at this point. The artificial induction had made Beckie have very long contractions instead of the nice round waves that we had been expecting. I did my best to keep her trying new things, on the chance that we might stumble on something that would make her more comfortable. We tried walking, swaying, sitting on the birth ball, leaning on the birth ball, side-laying... long story short, Beckie's back hurt and there wasn't much relief other than pushing on it. I'm so glad Beckie's mom was there. One of us would push and the other would be in Beckie's face, helping her through each successive wave. Beckie's mom was exhausted, since she hadn't had hardly any sleep, but we all just had to keep going.

About 2:00PM, Beckie started to get more and more wild-eyed and I could tell she was really struggling. I went to find the resident that we had met earlier in the morning, thinking maybe she could give us some advice on how Beckie was doing... the nurses were conspicuously absent at this point. I think our main nurse was actually over assisting in another delivery. About the time that the resident showed up, Dr. Brown arrived. Beckie's water had just broken - 2:55 PM, if I remember right. Dr. Brown was happy, since she was going to suggest that we break Beckie's water to see if that would get things moving. I'm really glad that it broke on its own, because even though the clock starts ticking when the water breaks (however it happens), Beckie's body was obviously doing the right things. Dr. Brown checked her cervix and she was dilated 5cm, which was partially discouraging, since we still hadn't even hit transition yet, but then I remembered that it was Beckie's emotional/physical state that told me where she was rather than some arbitrary opening size! She was definitely in active labor and doing good work.

Dr. Brown, however, having not watched Beckie all day long, thought she had plenty of time, and so she left to do some other things. Shortly after Dr. Brown left - just long enough for her to get stuck in LA traffic - Beckie looked at me with panic all over her face and said "I don't think I can do this!" I was torn, because I didn't want her to be in pain anymore, but I also didn't want to jump the gun on making decisions like C-Section without more information. I also knew that we were probably very close to meeting this baby!

The nurse was fussing with the monitors, and Beckie was getting more and more uncomfortable. Suddenly, Beckie says "I think I have to push!" The nurse, thinking that Beckie couldn't possibly be there yet, says "Just breathe. Don't push. You're not ready yet." Beckie was fighting her body, trying not to push, but she couldn't help it. She later told me it's like someone telling you not to vomit. You don't have a choice. Your body takes over.

She continued to fuss with the monitors, while I got more and more concerned about Beckie's state. I was up near Beckie's face, so I don't quite know what prompted the nurse to suddenly change her tune and start calling people, but Beckie's mom said the baby's head was crowned. When she told us the doctor was a half-hour away, Beckie yelled "I don't have a half hour! This baby is coming now!" Then the nurse actually got off the fence and called the delivery team in.

Suddenly, the room was filled with people. I think somewhere around a dozen people were in the room besides the three (almost four!) of us. They broke the bed down so that they would have better access to Beckie and the baby and then, suddenly, it was time to really push. The nurse midwife told Beckie just to push along with the contraction - whatever felt right. She bore down and pushed hard and there was a head! I wasn't sure what I was seeing... later I realized it was because the baby had so much hair! The cord was loosely wound around the neck - the doctor called out that fact and then said it wasn't a problem but that she wanted to move it. Once done, the midwife told Beckie to push along with the next contraction... just whatever was comfortable. Beckie started pushing and POP, we had an airborne baby! The doctor actually caught her as she got doused with a large amount of amniotic fluid that had been bottled up behind the baby. 4:24 PM - our baby is HERE!

They showed me that she was a baby girl and I got to tell Beckie. Then we flipped her up onto Beckie's chest... she got to lay there for several minutes as they toweled her off and got the cord ready to cut. I cut the cord more quickly than we wanted to, but Beckie had suffered a pretty decent tear since the baby had come so fast, and they wanted to get her all stitched up.

I went with our new baby girl to get weighed and measured. They gave her a vitamin-K shot in her leg and then she was mine to hold. I took her over by Beckie while they were still dealing with her stitches. I tried to keep her as close to Beckie as I could without being in the way. I handed her off to a proud Gramma at some point so that I could use the restroom and then she would up on Beckie's chest - she nursed within an hour of being born and was a pro at it her first try!

We headed to recovery together and got settled in there as a new family. Beckie's mom left for a while so we could discuss her name. We'd really struggled with finding the right name for her. Evelyn Grace was one we had been recently discussing and it felt right, so that's what we chose. We were afraid Evelyn was too grown up for a little baby, but somehow it fits her just right.

There's probably a lot I left out and there's a lot more that's happened since (obviously!). Beckie was a champ - I'm so proud of her effort. It was an amazing experience watching new life being brought into the world. Evelyn is a wonderful child and a joy to have in our lives.

Evelyn's Birth Story- Mom's Point of View

Evelyn’s birth didn’t start how I had imagined… I’d always thought I’d go into labor, spend early labor at home, then make the drive across LA (hopefully avoiding traffic) and arrive at the hospital to complete active labor, transition and delivery. Instead, at two weeks past our estimated due date, we had a scheduled induction. It was strange knowing exactly when labor was going to start. The element of surprise was gone but at that point it was a relief to know that there was an end in sight. The induction was scheduled for 10pm. Our small group arrived at our house around 7pm to pray with us before the big event. I was feeling nervous because induced labor contractions are more intense than natural contractions… medical science hasn’t quite managed to perfectly duplicate the necessary hormones. More intense contractions are harder for Mom and can cause fetal distress, increasing the likelihood of interventions and c-sections. My hope was to give birth without pain medications, which can slow labor and affect the baby during labor and after birth.

At 9pm we got in the car and made it to the hospital in a record 30 minutes. It’s amazing what a lack of traffic can do! A plus side to having a scheduled induction is that we were able to make the drive from Pasadena to Beverly Hills minus contractions. We calmly checked in and were shown to the early labor room where we would start the induction. It took about an hour to answer all the questions from our nurse, Carmen, and do the initial exam. I was 1.5cm dilated, about 40% effaced, and the baby was at -3 station. At 11pm the pitocin was started. Induction means significantly more instrumentation than a natural labor: continuous external fetal monitoring (EFM), IV for pitocin drip and saline solution, and frequent blood pressure monitoring. To go to the restroom, I had to unplug from multiple machines, maneuver an IV pole around the bed, and hold up both my hospital gown and multiple cords… all while breathing through contractions!

My first blood pressure was a bit high so they decided to keep me on the monitor for a few hours to keep an eye on things. Not surprising considering how nervous and excited I was about the upcoming events! I started to have some light cramping in my back so my mum massaged my lower back and hip until I fell asleep. I was able to sleep for about two 45-minute stretches. Due to the late start, we had decided that Matthew would sleep during the early labor stuff so that he would be fresh for when things picked up. By about 2am, they were convinced that my blood pressure was fine and they finally took the cuff off, which made life a little more comfortable. (As a side note, I had angry red marks on my arm for about 2 weeks after Evelyn arrived from having the cuff on so long and often during labor)

We requested a telemetry monitor, which arrived around 3am, so that I could spend some time walking the halls. Basically, this a remote sensor about the size of a purse that could be hooked to my IV pole and transmit to the main EFM unit. I spent a couple hours walking the halls with mum, IV pole in tow. They start the induction with a low level of pitocin and increase the amount every 30 minutes until the body starts to experience regular contractions… for example, I started at 2 and by about level 6, I started to feel some light contractions. While I was walking Carmen came to turn down the pitocin (from 12 to 10) because I was basically have continuous contractions. I’d thought it was just increased intensity from finally getting upright and moving around. At each contraction I would stop, grab onto the hallway railings, and hula-hoop my hips while mum massaged my lower back. A doula for another patient suggested squatting during the contractions, something we had also discussed in our childbirth classes, but that made my lower back hurt.

At 6:30am I had another internal exam… I was now 2cm dilated, 60% effaced and the baby had moved down slightly to -2 station. Not much to show for the last 7.5 hours. At this point, there was a shift change and I was introduced to our new nurse, Heather, and the daytime resident, Dr. Zakhour. Shortly after this Heather introduced us to one of the physicians at Cedars and asked if I was interested in trying a technique called the foley bulb, a suggestion from my OB. The procedure involves placing a catheter with a bulb on the end inside the cervix and inflating the bulb with liquid. The catheter tube is taped to the inside of the thigh and the nurses occasionally check progress by tugging the tube slightly. When the baby has not engaged the pelvis, sometimes the cervix needs a little help. The pressure of the bulb acts to help dilate and efface the cervix similar to the way a baby’s head does normally. Eventually the cervix dilation is larger than the size of the bulb and the bulb comes out, leaving a nice large (well, relatively speaking) space for the baby’s head to drop into and finish the dilation process. It also means that the cervix has reached 4cm dilation and what the hospital considers to be active labor.

After the doctor inserted the bulb, Matthew and I walked the halls some more. By now the contractions were starting to be pretty regular and definitely made me stop to focus on each one. We were able to finally see some early morning light coming in and realized we’d probably have the baby today! After walking for about an hour, I felt something dribble down my leg and realized that I was lightly bleeding from the foley catheter tube. The nurse checked and told me everything was fine. She brought me a supersized sanitary pad (think adult diaper-sized) and mesh underwear. Incredibly unattractive. Incredibly comfortable.

I was starting to have back pain so I climbed back into bed, alternating between lying on my side and kneeling while leaning on the inclined headrest of the bed. I also spent some time in “slow-dance position” with Matthew. At 9:30, Dr. Zakhour returned to check on me and, with a small pop, the foley bulb was out! We bonded over our amusement at mesh underwear and the like while she performed an internal exam. Voilà… 4cm dilation! We were told we’d be moving to an active labor room as soon as one was available but that the ward was a bit busy. By this point I was having pretty serious back labor so we started trying the various techniques we’d learned in our childbirth class to deal with the situation. Walking felt good but I didn’t like dealing with contractions in the hall so we spent most of the time in our tiny room- swaying, side-lying, kneeling on all fours. Matthew and mum took turns applying counter pressure to my lower back during contractions and talked me through the contractions.

Just before noon, a delivery room opened up. I had originally wanted a room with a tub but I realized that I probably wouldn’t be able to get much use out of one with all the machinery attached to me. The room I ended up in had a shower and an amazing view of the hills through a full wall of windows. Once in the room we continued to work through contractions. Matthew encouraged me to continue to try new positions every hour or so. I didn’t really want to because moving hurt my back but I knew that I should. The back pain was bad enough at this point that I needed one person applying pressure to my back and the other person in my face, talking me through the contractions and helping me to remain relaxed between contractions. I rotated between sitting cross-legged on the end of the bed, kneeling on the bed with my head and arms resting on the birth ball, and sitting on the birth ball on the floor. Matthew and mum would rest between sets of contractions- I would have several contractions rapidly together and then have a break. There were a couple times I told Matthew that I didn’t think I could do this… he encouraged me and praised how well I was doing.

We had a substitute nurse, Susan, for a while as Heather was required in another delivery room. Susan informed me that Dr. Brown was going to be coming in to discuss breaking my water bags in order to help labor progress. The monitor displaying my contractions didn’t pick most of them up so the nursing staff didn’t really have a good idea of how my labor was progressing. According to the monitor, I was moving pretty slowly. We were torn on whether we wanted the intervention. Once the waters have been broken, labor has a time limit set due to the increased risk of infection. We weren’t sure we wanted to commit to that if my body wasn’t ready. It didn’t turn out to be an issue though- Matthew reminded me it was time to change positions so I rolled from being on my knees/birth ball to my side and there was a “pop” and a gush. My body did it all on it’s own at 2:55pm! A few minutes later, Dr. Brown arrived and was very pleased to hear the news. She performed an internal exam and I had progressed to 5 centimeters. Dr. Brown decided that we’d be fine for the next couple hours so she was planning in returning at 5:30 to check on me again.

Hearing that I was at 5 centimeters was a downer for me. I was already in a great deal of pain, due to the fact that the back pain did not yield between contractions. I thought about having to do this for hours and hours and started to panic. I told Matthew that I really couldn’t do this. In our childbirth class we learned about emotional signposts of labor. These signs can be an even more accurate assessment of how labor is progressing than dilation. The third and most difficult phase is self-doubt. Pre-childbirth I hadn’t realized how intense this phase was. We were taught that the woman would believe “I can’t do this” and the partner should take this as a sign that transition was happening. It would be more accurate to describe the sentiment as “I-can’t-do-this-and-I’m-going-to-die.” Matthew immediately recognized that I was much further along in the labor process than either the nurses or I realized. I didn’t ask for drugs- I remember thinking that all I needed to do was tell Matthew our safety phrase and he could tell the nurse. But I knew I’d be disappointed. Instead I stared into Matthew’s eyes and tried not to panic with each contraction. Matthew could tell I was hurting but knew in his heart that the baby wasn’t far from coming. He did his best to comfort me.

About 15 minutes after Dr. Brown left I suddenly felt a need to go to the bathroom. I told the nurse “I either need to poop or push!” She was doubtful that pushing was the case but when she performed an internal exam, my cervix had reached 7cm. She told me to breath through the urge to push, little puffs of air, since I wasn’t fully dilated yet. She spent the next bit of time fiddling with the baby’s heart rate belt and gathering items for the delivery, but with no real sense of urgency. With each contraction, my uterus would push, despite my best efforts. It was like trying to stop myself from vomiting, but in the other direction. The nurse responded to my grunts with “Don’t push. Small breaths.” Really, lady?!

“I’m not pushing,” I growled/yelled at her. That finally got her attention. She called Dr. Brown and informed us she would be there in 30 minutes.

“I don’t have 30 minutes. This is happening now!”

She sent out a call for the delivery team and sat at the foot of the bed, still trying to keep me from pushing. By this point the baby was starting to crown. Within minutes our room was filled with people, bustling through preparations for Mini Munson’s arrival- Heather, Dr. Zakhour, a nurse midwife, nursing students, the man to count gauze pads, a pediatric nurse, the pediatrician’s representative, a chief of surgery. About 15 people in all. Matthew, mum and I waited impatiently while they removed the bottom half of my bed and counted out scissors and gauze pads. Dr. Zakhour would be catching our baby in Dr. Brown’s absence. I was relieved to have a relatively familiar face in that position.

During this all, my body was still pushing the baby out, with no encouragement from me. My internal monologue at the time:

“Wait… this baby is coming out of where?!”

“Hey look- the Hollywood sign!”

“There is no way out of this now…”

Finally I was told I could push. I bore down and the head emerged. The doctor paused me to gently unwrap the umbilical cord, which was loosely around the baby’s neck. The midwife told me that when I felt the next contraction to push as I felt comfortable. A moment later the contraction started. I took a deep breath and pushed. Then another breath and another push and Mini literally shot out, with a huge splash of amniotic fluid. Our baby was airborne for it’s first seconds out here in the world, at 4:24pm. Safely caught, they lifted Mini for us to see and Matthew got to say, “It’s a girl!”

She was immediately placed on my chest, a warm, wet, wiggly little girl. We still were not 100% certain of her name so we had Baby Girl for a couple hours. I was so focused on this beautiful little person that I didn’t really notice the cord being cut and the placenta delivered. I just kept saying “baby girl” over and over. I have never felt such incredible joy.

After having her on my chest for about 15 minutes, the surgeon asked if it would be ok for Matthew to take the baby. I had a bad tear, potentially fourth degree, and they were considering taking me to the OR to stitch me up because the lighting would be better there. Matthew took Baby Girl to be weighed and measured while the team worked on cleaning me up. Between the cessation of back pain and the feel-good hormones pumping through my body, I actually laughed when they asked if I was in pain and gave a very sassy “I’m good. My back doesn’t hurt any more!”

It was decided that the lighting was fine in the delivery room and I was offered local anesthetics and an IV painkiller so they could stitch me up. The midwife told me that the drug had a very short half-life and would not affect the baby through my breast milk so I accepted. At this point, Dr. Brown arrived. The surgeon happened to be a good friend of hers so the two worked together to stitch me up. It took them about an hour to stitch the third degree tear. (Here is a link showing illustrations of vaginal tear severity by degree)

At last I got to hold my little girl again. She was very agreeable to getting some food so I nursed her for the very first time in the delivery room. What an incredible experience!

I held her as my bed was pushed to the recovery room. Everyone we passed in the hallways congratulated us. After settling into the recovery room, mum gave Matthew and I some time to our selves to discuss the all-important name. When she returned we were pleased to introduce her to her granddaughter:

Evelyn Grace.